Project as of Now, and Probably Forever

My project involves creating an installation that provokes new ways of thinking about personal decision-making and what influences those decisions in our culture. I plan to compare two personal choices I have made in my life to evaluate and present the concept. First is my decision to hunt, and second is my decision to become a vegan. These two decisions I have made are directly effected by the way I have been raised and the experiences I have had growing up, yet they are very contradicting ideas. The project’s goal is to offer insight into ones control of free will and independent thought in a society that is so strongly based on pre-established values.

            The work I have done up to this point has been mostly collage. Constructing these images has helped me develop my concept and also pushed me to create an installation. Because my concept is very heavily based on questioning cultural norms, I think it is important to push myself to create work that also questions traditional forms of making and presenting my work.

            I plan to build the installation in a grid of small paper pyramids (constructed on a plane). The pyramids will be set on a slightly elevated base so that viewers can look down on the piece at about knee height. Two images will be formed within the grid to appear as a flat image when looking at the grid from a specific angle. These two images will exist in the same grid but both cannot be seen at the same time. The 3-D pyramids will allow fragments of each image to create abstract shapes and forms when viewing the grid from different points of view. 

Images

Studio Log / This is what's on my mind

In my discussion with small groups today I realized that I don’t like creating an image that distinguishes figure and ground through typical uses of color and shapes. I think the reason I have started creating images in such a geometric way is because there is more room for the figure ground relationship to change. This is partially why I am attracted to Picasso, Frank Stella, and other cubist/modern artists. Their work creates more complex relationships that can stand as both figure and ground elements within their work. There are other reasons why I like their work but in more of a formal way I think this is why I am interested in that style.

So through recent studies I have found that I am trying to tackle all of the issues of my project at once. I need to slow down. Studies are Studies for a reason. There are a few key elements to the work that need to be worked out before I can begin thinking about more complex relationships. For instance, the color in my recent studies has been at random and as a result it is ruining a lot of feeling and intelligence to the work. I have always enjoyed working with color but for some reason I brushed it aside and I am upset that I did that. Color will be a key element in creating relationships between figure and ground that I have been talking about. I want to watch out for using color in typical ways to create these relationships. I think I need to do some very specific color studies and then begin working on the larger composition. Also the use of pattern or drawing within the color fields will become important. It seems to be effective in my previous work where as solid colors in recent studies have become boring. The use of the solid color fields makes me feel like I am just going through the motions of creating a pretty image.

So now it comes down to my subject matter. What am I doing with my work? I have come to realize that the objects I have chosen are less random than I first thought; especially the rifle. This object relates strongly back to my childhood and how I was raised to think. I think we have all posed the question: “am I a result of the way I have been raised or do I have independent thoughts that have made me who I am today?” The work I am creating has become an exploration of that question.

Being at U of M I like to think that I have become more independent and have been able to question a lot of social norms that I don’t agree with. Actually I have tried to question everything and put it into perspective outside of a social context. Becoming a vegetarian, and recently becoming a vegan, has been a result of making a personal choice. I don’t think I really understood the significant of making a personal choice or what it really means to do so until recently. Choices like these define independence and ones sense of moral obligation as a human being.

So my original idea steamed from one of the professional practice lectures. In a note-taking exercise I found myself pondering the reason for creating relationships between two extremes. The relationship can only exist when both extremes are present. For example: our threshold of pain and pleasure. I have never broken a bone in my life therefore I can’t perceive how much that might hurt. The most physical pain I have endured has been related to some sort of burn or cut which in my mind is probably less painful than having a bone broken. Through my experiences with pain, I have created a sort of scale that can give my brain some type of prediction as to how much something will hurt, but the scale is limited because I have no experience of the pain of breaking a bone. So the goal of my artwork is to help create new ways of evaluating this scale. Rather than having the scale be something that is physical, it will be something social and cultural (something that can be open for interpretation). In comes the idea of independent thought and free will.

Freeeeee will...I have had some conversations about this subject. It is tricky because it is hard to accept the fact that we may in fact have no free will. I think it relates very strongly to the idea of independence and moral obligation. So here is what makes the most sense to me…. Essentially we don’t have free will. Our actions are ultimately decided by every past experience we have had in our life. We have no control at the beginning of our life as to whom we meet, what we interact with, where we live, when we live and how things happen determine how we will make choices. I’m not saying that we don’t have the ability to challenge what we have been taught, but I am saying that the act of challenging what we were taught is the result of former experiences forcing us to make that decision. I do see the existence of independence through questioning and analysis, but I also see very heavy influence coming from uncontrollable variables that make us think and act the way we do. My becoming a vegetarian was in response to the people I have met in my life and the reason I met them is because I decided to go to Michigan, I decided to go to Michigan because of its presence in my life while I was growing, it was present in my childhood because my parents decided to live in Michigan…. and so on….

I want to create a piece that is challenging and thought provoking. I want the work to bring the viewer into a new context that questions the social norm (not to determine if something is right or wrong but to provoke analysis). I want to create new ‘scales’ that define the relationship between objects and I want to do this all in a way that explores new ways of creating figure ground relationships. The piece is leaning more and more towards an installation. In the spirit of challenging social norms I think I need to challenge the medium in which I am working.

So I believe I have decided on my subject matter. It is related to my experience growing up with my family. More specifically the type of experience I have with hunting. This is where the image of the rifle was derived from. Although I am working on becoming a vegan, I don’t see a lot wrong with hunting. Its benefits have more to do with social values rather than the act of killing an animal for food.

I guess the best way to describe this would be portraying my experience of killing a deer. I have only killed one deer in my life and I had the chance to let it live. I don’t regret killing the deer but I don’t feel good about it either. I view it as a valuable life experience that I have learned a lot from. Basically it was the last day for me to hunt and I was alone in my blind without anyone near me for at least 2 miles. I was communicating with my father and brother through walkie-talkies so I could really tell them anything I wanted to. When the deer came into my sight it was the first buck I had seen in the wild while hunting. I didn’t have a permit to kill a doe so this was my only chance. I watched the deer for a while contemplating whether I should even tell my father or brother about it. If I were to tell them I knew I would have to kill it, but I was ready to kill it. I knew what I had to do and in a way I felt like it was what I was supposed to do. So I told them that the buck was in my sight and I shot it. Watching the animal die was a sad thing to see but I didn’t feel guilty or like I had made the wrong decision.

Now I am a vegetarian/vegan for far different reasons than killing the deer. In other words I didn’t kill the deer and say I feel terrible I’m never going to eat meat again. Despite the fact that they derived from very different situations, they are so closely related in the context of my life. They are two very extreme ends of the spectrum and I am surprised that I have experienced both. The ‘scale’ between the two has become complex and unclear. I’m hoping the installation will help me understand the relationship between these dramatic points in my life but also help create new ways of thinking about them both for myself and the viewer. Charlie brought up an interesting point in that artwork can’t really solve anything but it can offer insight. When I finish this piece I can’t expect to be at a point where I completely understand why I act the way I do, weather or not I am a product of the way I am raised. The process of art making is the process of redefining these thoughts and constantly questioning myself and the social/cultural aspect of my life.

Proposal

            I want to create large-scale prints that evoke a sense of mystery and depth between recognizable images. The images will exist within an abstract arrangement of shapes and intense, vibrant color. The goal of the images is to take the viewer out of the context of their lives and make them feel like they are in a different time and space. It is supposed to evoke a new way of thinking. By seeing two seemingly unrelated objects within the context of an abstract print and outside of the viewer’s comfort zone, new relationships begin to form between the objects and the cultural and psychological weight that they carry. I hope that viewing these images in this context will provoke new ways of thinking about existing cultures and philosophies.

            Which recognizable objects I am going to use in my prints has not been determined. The objects that I use must be culturally relevant and also thought provoking when viewed in the context of the prints. As of now, I am thinking of only putting two images within each print, but that is subject to change. More complex relationships may be established with a greater amount of recognizable images, but a more powerful and simple relationship may be made with fewer images.

In order to create a feeling of being in a new space, the location and presentation of the prints must be well planned and executed. Simply placing the prints on a wall in a gallery will not suffice. There needs to be complete attention given to the prints with no peripheral distractions. Also the viewer needs to feel detached from the gallery (or whatever building the work is displayed in). As of now, I think the prints should exist in a large room with lights illuminating only the prints. The viewers will exist in darkness as they observe the images. The passage into the room should feel uncomfortable, almost scary, as if the viewers shouldn't be going into this room. The entire experience of viewing the work should disconnect them from any type of environment or state of mind they were in before they view the prints.

            Artist James Turrell seems to have a strong understanding of the space in which he works.  He understands how to manipulate light in order to influence how people perceive it. My goal is to achieve a similar affect using different materials. Takashi Murakami has also recently influenced me. His work uses flat planes of color to create elaborate images of very anime based imagery. Although I am not as inspired by anime, I would like to create similar connections to specific cultures and also give my work the same vibrant and surreal quality. I also want to explore the use of non-rectangular surfaces to compose my prints on as seen in Frank Stella’s work.

            The Prints will exist on paper and I will create them through woodcarving and hand printing. Some painted elements may be added to help construct the images. Some prints may be spread across multiple sheets of paper and be presented adjacent to each other. I hope to have at least three finished prints by the end of March. Finding a space in Ann Arbor is also a concern of mine. I want to have at least 3 places in mind where I will present my work by January. The presentation of the prints is almost more important than the prints themselves. 

Study 9.1 - Glass Reflections/Buildings

Study 9.2

Study 8 - Comics

Studio Log

These Studies have been helpful. They make me feel productive, give me something to look at, and also have helped me develop some new ideas for my final project. All of the images are google searched, cut up, and then joined randomly in a collage. These collages have helped me pin point the type of imagery that makes work interesting and thought provoking; whether its a certain arrangement of shapes or the location of recognizable symbols or images.

I think it will be beneficial to me to stop putting so much weight on every shape, color and symbol that I use in my work. Some elements of my work need to complement the more significant ones without overpowering them. Ultimately the statement in my work is going to be derived form the subject matter in which I start with, and the two or three elements in the work that are most noticeable yet integrated with the rest of the image. 

Color has been working surprisingly well within each composition. The found images were not altered at all yet the all seem to work will both in terms of color value and hue. I am going to continue to create these collages and soon start to manipulate the color within them as another way to abstract the image. I hope to find myself in the print studio within another week. 

Study 7 - Fences

Study 6 - water

Study 5 - bikes

More Studies

Study 4 - NES screenshots

Study 3 - People

Another Study - Shapes derived from NYC 

Studio Log

The first few weeks in my studio were spent developing the concept behind the prints that I want to make. My original idea involved creating environments from found shapes that were derived from other environments. The original environments would be deconstructed into shapes and pieces which would then be used to rebuild a new environment. This whole process of deconstruction and rebuilding was a way for me to create a relationship between two different places through imagery. 

Although I was quite excited about this project and how the end result would look, I still feel like I have a shallow understanding of the relationships I am trying to create. So over the past weeks I have been brainstorming, trying to find some sort of subject-matter that i find interesting enough to create a genuine and exciting statement through my work. I was (and still am) in a confused state of mind. I am trying to derive a strong subject matter through thought alone... and its not going smoothly. I feel like my mind is playing a trick on me by encouraging me to keep brainstorming but never letting be be satisfied with what I come up with.

In my first discussion with Charlie he suggested that I begin to create some images that relate to my project but don't involve a specific subject matter or too much thought. In doing this, I hope to create some images that will help inspire me and give me a chance to look at my project in a different perspective. For my first image, I derived all of the shapes and color from various corporate logos. The image that I created form these shapes didn't create a statement about these corporations, it is only a study of color and composition.

After this images was created Charlie and I met again and were able to come up with some interesting parallels based on the way I work visually and musically. When writing music, I find that i can write instrumental parts to songs much easier than lyrics. The notes I play feel more intuitive. I don't need to explain to myself why I am content with the notes I am playing, they just come naturally and I can enjoy them. When creating visual work I have a similar way of working. The shapes and colors I choose seem to fall together logically without too much conscious reasoning. Through this method of building images I can create visually pleasing work that evokes emotion and feeling as my music does. The trouble comes in writing lyrics which is the equivalent to defining the subject matter for my work. Lyrics in a song (which can be abstract and metaphorical) become a statement that is associated with ones culture, experiences, and values. This statement is not as universal as sound alone. I feel that I am forcing lyrics upon a song just as I am trying to force a certain concept into my artwork. Overall I feel like I know what i want my piece to look like in the end, and I am trying to work around that to create a statement.

Charlie and I also brought up the work of James Turrell. It was a refreshing new look into an environment and how it was being transformed. Turrell uses light and architecture in an existing environment in order to create a completely new experience within the same environment. He is working with very common forms and resources to build something that is completely new and shocking, yet it all exists in the same physical realm that we have grown up in (architecture and sunlight). It is a more abstract way of looking at a transformation and the types of relationships it can create. I feel like I was limiting myself by thinking of only turning one place into another place. Where this will take me is unclear but i plan to keep my eyes open for a certain place, event, or idea that sparks my interest and will inspire me to take my work to a higher level.

What am I more likely to be inspired by?

Culture or Nature?

I think I am going to have to choose nature. Both nature and culture have a great amount of potential in them but i think nature is more inspiring because it is more of a constant around the world and doesn't need to exist in a certain context. Culture is very interesting but also very confusing when examining a culture that is not one that you have grown up in. I feel that one must experience a culture to its fullest in order to make legitimate work that is inspired by it. I feel that it wold be very easy to get something wrong if you are an outsider looking in on a foreign culture where as nature is something that everyone around the world has had experience with. Nature can be used in many different contexts in order to create interesting thoughts, relationships, and statements that can be recognized and understood by most people. On the other hand, a persons perception of artwork based around nature is greatly dependent on their cultural background.

Production or Consumption?

I guess I'm thinking of production and consumption in a social context. Production of goods for sale and consumption by people. I would have to say that production inspires me more. Consumption always seems to have a negative statement attached to it. Any type of statement about our societies consumption is always about over-consumption and demand for useless things. Its a powerful message but I have never had the desire to spread awareness or use it to express myself. Production has always interested me because of the process in which things are made and the systems that are created in order to reach its final goal. The production end of the market shows innovation and intricate parts of a system working together in order to make our society function efficiently. It may not function in the most efficient and responsible way but it is definitely working....

Myself or others?

I have always enjoyed making work for others more than for myself. I am way more inspired when making something that I know others will appreciate and value. I usually find myself struggling to find work that I am making for myself. But maybe I'm looking at this the wrong way. Many artists have inspired me and my work in the past. To inspire myself would be to to think in an avant-garde way. To create something completely original where no other person could have inspired you as much as you have inspired yourself. From this point of view I see more potential in the ability to inspire oneself, but it is much harder to reach that level without inspiration from others. Ideally inspiration should be coming from both myself and others.

Presence or absence of contentment?

I don't think contentment can be inspiring. Being content is being happy with what you are doing and that would be a sign that whatever work you are doing is going well for you as an artist. It doesn't necessarily mean that you are inspired to be more creative. I don't think creative ideas can be derived from the feeling of being happy with a project. Being less content may force me to look in new directions for ideas but I wont search my malcontent for inspiration. so i suppose being unhappy with my work eventually will lead to better ideas that will ultimately help me become content with my work. Therefore I choose the absence of contentment to be more inspiring.

Facts or Feelings?

Facts can be interesting but feelings are deep. There is argument, emotion, and a sense of personality attached to ones feeling where as facts are cold and hard. I think feelings can inspire much more interesting concepts behind ones work. It takes work in a direction that allows for discussion in whatever context it exists where as facts present a statement and stick with it. Using our feelings for insperation can also lead to self evaluation. We can reach new realizations about ourselves and others which can inspire new ways of thinking and creating.